Articles for Spouses

The Power of "And"

by Debbie Laaser
If you live in black-and-white thinking, there is absolutely no way to make sense of sexual betrayal and words that confess, “Even though I’m looking at pornography or I’ve had an affair, I have always loved you.” The problem is that most of the world does live in an all-or-nothing mindset.
Continue Reading The Power of "And"


by Shattered Vows by Debbie Laaser
Practical Tools for Restoring Trust When beginning to recover from sexual betrayal, a wife needs to know daily that her husband has stopped his sexual acting out. Some are afraid to ask because their husband gets angry and defensive when they do. Others want to avoid "being his mother" by constantly asking him questions. To avoid these pitfalls, Mark and I suggest a checking-in process called FANOS, an acronym derived from a Greek word meaning "to shed light on" or "to bring to light."
Continue Reading FANOS

What's beneath the use of pornography?

by Greg and Erin Smalley
Instead of focusing on getting your husband to stop looking at pornography, we want to encourage you to focus on the deeper underlying issues.
Continue Reading What's beneath the use of pornography?

How Can We Rebuild Our Relationship?

by Debbie Laaser
Recently I woke up surprised by a dream I'd had; I dreamed I was alone. After more than thirty years of choosing to stay in my marriage and recover from sexual betrayal, I couldn't figure out what would prompt me to have such a dream.
Continue Reading How Can We Rebuild Our Relationship?

Creating Shared Vision

by Debbie Laaser, MA, LMFT
Having vision keeps you on track when the going gets tough. And it will. Remember vision requires change. Change always presents loss and chaos, and both stir up many feelings. Even if what you are seeking to change is good, you leave something behind as you change. All change involves loss, and all loss requires grieving.
Continue Reading Creating Shared Vision

Back to Sexual Addiction Articles

Submit an Article